How not to piss off your editor

Years ago, I had a mini image series with tips on how to keep your editor from wanting to strangle you (we love our clients but, sometimes, there is an urge to scream at the computer because of them). We see some crazy things done in novels and some of them are just way out in left field. Here's my tips and why you should avoid these things.

* USE SPELL CHECK

For the love of all that is holy, use your spell check. You don't have to go and use fancy online edit programs, but PLEASE use spell check. It's downright obscene the amount of times I've gotten a MS without this done. Also, it's damn rude. It's a big ass check mark in the corner, click it.

*APOSTROPHES ARE NOT FOR PLURALS

Honestly, I didn't think this was a thing that still needed to be said. But, it does. STOP FREAKING DOING IT. Makes me wanna crack knuckles with a ruler.

Example: The bird's are singing. <<<<f*ckin' wrong

The birds are singing. <<<< not wrong

*PUNCTUATION

Punctuation is tricky, yes, and it's my job to help with it. But don't do this bullshit:

!!! ??? ?!?

It looks like you just texted me this book and that's just not cute.

*TENSE & PoV

Please specify which tense and point of view you intended your novel in. I don't wanna get six pages in and have to hunt you down to ask you what you intended because this is a friggin' wreck.

*SELF-EDIT

Or at least read your book once (or four) times. Sending an editor a rough draft is just an asshole move. There's so many incomplete thoughts, plot holes, and contradicting statements that you can catch on your own and not have to answer a billion questions and make the edit process easier(and less stressful) on yourself in the long run.